
Current Offenders

Sam "Arphu" Foster
Drums / dental hygiene
The son of traveling archaeological missionaries (more than a thousand mummies converted and counting!), Arphu was raised primarily in Asia. His time among the nomadic peoples of northern Mongolia left him with a difficult-to-pronounce name and an affinity for reindeer steaks, which are really hard to get in the U.S.
A former student of McNally Smith College Of Music and a current attendee of the night classes at St. Augustine's Correctional Facility (day classes are only for the minimum-security guys), Arphu spends his free time training carrier pidgeons to steal avocados from unsuspecting millenials.

Anthony Staten
Bass / gingervitis
Released from the cage for every SGF show (plus once per day to go to the bathroom, which at age 32 he finally learned how to do outside), Anthony provides the thump-thump on the stage, and the hump-hump everywhere else. Seriously....look at that face. He's a fiend.
A McNally Smith College Of Music alum, father of one, and the author of the popular "Help! The Sun Shined For Eight Seconds And Now I Have Blisters" pamphlets at your local pharmacy, Anthony spends a bit of time trash-talking exotic fish on Twitter.

Karin Moreaux
Fiddle / conscience
The newest, smartest, and most distinguished member of the abominable quintuplet known as SGF, Karin also has had to explain to her mom at least three times that this isn't a ransom thing and she really is in the band of her own volition.
An alum of Gustavus Adolphus college and a full-time orchestra director, Karin chooses to use her powers for primarily for good and spends her time exploring the subtelties of high-end coffee and low-end bourbon.
You can find Karin online, but you have to do it yourself. EARN IT.